Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize