Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
he laminated a picture of his dick.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize