I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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