I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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