This is not my ceiling
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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