i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
You may now shotgun with the bride
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Randomize
