Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
