I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
