Having a random hookup so left but love u
Betty ford says i'm here all night
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
