I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Randomize
