Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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