Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize