I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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