Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
We just shotgunned beers for America
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
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