i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Randomize
