what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
