kristin has been a bad kristin
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
He shit in the fireplace
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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