You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
