I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
i've created a new STD.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
