What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize