why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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