she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize