He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
