I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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