YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize