I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
is that a dick in a sweater?
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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