My sheets look like a crime scene.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
