You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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