he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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