Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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