Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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