Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
ok first of all what the fuck
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
