Can Purell be used as lube?
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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