Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
