Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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