Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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