i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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