there was a trapeze. enough said
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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