i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
