I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
