Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Randomize
