therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
