I CAN MOONWALK!
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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