and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
