We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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