why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize