I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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