So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I just blew my weed a kiss
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize