So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize