just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize