so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
